Affirmation
by Aoi-Kitsune
Summary: [SV ONESHOT] Even though she denied it, but deep down in the most inner recesses of her mind, she knew with a certainty, that what he thought of her would affect her the most.


**Disclaimer:** Suikoden V belongs to their respective owners.

**A.N:** This is dedicated to my long-time internet friend, rainbowcake. It's actually her Christmas present, but since I'm such a slacker (go me!) I could not think of anything particularly Christmassy to write about.

**Warning: **One of the characters is OOC. I tried my best to make him in-character, but the more I try the more OOC he becomes. So, I let it be. Hahaha…

- - - - -

The sky was dark and hazy that one afternoon, if one could see it at all through the icy shower that splashed on the greenery from the heavens above. The small iridescent droplets could be heard plopping on the windowpanes, accompanied by bright flashes of lightning and the dull crash of thunder. To put it simply, it was raining. The room, cold and gloomy and obviously synonymous to the depressing weather outside the window. Any room would usually be teeming with people huddled in thick blankets, to ward off the icy chill of the rain, but this particular room wasn't. Anyone would have thought the room was bare and empty was he or she to open the door to the room, and not even notice the feminine outline of a person near the window.

She sat silently with a serene smile on her face, as she always did, looking out and watching listlessly as the raindrops trickled down the smooth windowpanes, leaving trails of tiny droplets, as if it was soft silk carefully spun into an intricate web by an arachnid. She wondered when the others, her friends, would return. She and her friends had been occupying the simple room in the castle founded by the Prince for a few months now, or was it weeks? She didn't know as she didn't keep time regularly. Wrapping the thick woolen blanket tighter around her body, she curled her knees up against her chest and laid her head gently on them, all the while watching the sky crying its tears.

The Prince had enlisted Oboro to investigate someone, she didn't pay close attention to what the Prince had said, and normally she would have gone with him, had he not stopped her. Oboro had told her to get some rest for the day, although she was not physically injured, but she had an inkling maybe he was worried about what happened with Nakula the day before. She fondly remembered as he had grumbled when Oboro told him about his 'extra' work, muttering incorrigible threats under his breath. Fuyo had left earlier, chirping happily about a new dish that was being served in the restaurant, and she had wanted to sample it. She had asked her, if she would like some, but she had gently shook her head to the plump woman.

Thus, she was left alone in the room, wasting her hours away watching the raindrops roll down the clear windows. She didn't realize she had stopped staring at the rain, and instead stared at her reflection in the windows. All she could see was a face, with a petite smile plastered on it. She had always smiled, didn't she? Even when she felt her heart was breaking into tiny pieces, or even when she was sure she felt like breaking something. She had always smiled through those times. She never did understand, of all the expressions that could have been on her face, that sickly sweet smile of hers remained, unchanging. She disliked the way she could only smile, smile and smile.

She could not remember most of her past, only fleeting and blurry images, but she tried her best not to forget what or who she was before she became an assassin. When she was younger and still in training in Nether Gate, she had been told that the assassins had brought her in from a derelict village that was pillaged and later burnt down by bandits and thieves. She did not have the faintest memory of who her parents were, which village did she come from or if even her name now was ever really her own.

However, what she could remember was her rigorous and harsh training in Nether Gate, something she obviously didn't want to ever remember. She had been taught only two things during her tumultuous life as a Nether Gate assassin, how to kill and how to smile. When she was no less than six, she had been molded into a formidable weapon and had taken more lives than a soldier in war did. She had more spilt blood on her hands and weapons than the blood she had lost in battle. She had killed many, many people and taken countless lives, she truly regretted that. But, nobody knew since all that was on her face was a smile.

People, mostly traitors to the Queen of Falena, whom she had assassinated called her many names, just briefly before they felt the cold steel against their throats and were silenced. Some have called her a 'monster' and a 'cold-blooded murderer', she was sure there were many others, but she simply forgot them. Fuyo kept reassuring her that she needn't worry about what they call her, not that those comments and remarks ever did hurt her feelings though, and even if it did, the stinging will fade with time. Even though she denied it, but deep down in the most inner recesses of her mind, she knew with a certainty, that what he thought of her would affect her the most.

Did he think of her like the others did? … What did he actually think of her?

She realized she could no longer hear the constant pitter-pattering of the raindrops, and looked out of the window. The rain had softened to a light drizzle and she could see the sun peeking out from behind the gray clouds. She hugged her knees closer to her chin, taking in the warmth of the soft blanket around her. She didn't like to admit it, but she would feel sad and depressed, if he were to tell that he thought of her as a monster, a fiend... just like everyone else.

But... would he?

- - - - -

She heard footsteps outside the room, and the sound of water dripping slowly to the floor. From the incoherent mumbling and swearing she could hear, she assessed that it was he currently outside the door and fumbling with the doorknob. She quietly slid out from under the blankets and folded it so it would better fit in one of the drawers. After a few sound minutes of cursing, she heard the lock click. She turned to the doorway in time to see him enter, dripping wet with the water pooling under his feet.

"…Gah, what a pain…"

She smiled and silently laughed. For the past few years, living with Oboro truly had an amazing effect on her emotions, as she had been more expressive now than before. She watched him, in amusement; dispose his drenched cloak onto the floor and grab a towel on one of the racks to dry himself off.

"Welcome back. Where's Oboro?"

She proceeded to pick off the cloak and towel he had messily strewn onto the floor as he sat on one of the settees.

"Delivering the report to the brat himself."

She hung the soggy articles on one of the chairs, all the while smiling amusingly at his term for the Prince, their leader-of-sorts. Silence hung over them like a veil, and all could be heard was the slight chirping of the birds that came out to sing after the rain. She turned her head to the window and a sliver of sunshine glistening on the raindrops that still clung to the windowpanes. She moved next to the windows and placed a pale hand on the windows, idly tracing the flowing raindrops. Should she break the silence? Dare she?

"... Do... you think I'm a monster?"

"… Is this about what happened yesterday?"

"…"

"Sagiri…"

"Do you?"

She heard him shift and move uncomfortably on the settee, she presumed he had stood up and was staring at her. She ignored the footsteps and continued to stare out the window into the sky. A hand made its presence known by patting on her head, she was slightly taken aback with his gesture, but she didn't dislike it either.

"I don't think you're a monster, Sagiri. …I never did."

That was more than enough affirmation she needed and wanted from him, enough to make her feel all warm on the inside, like the glow of the setting sun.

"Thank you."

- - - - -

**A.N:** Criticism is much encouraged but no flames please.


End file.
